Why Emotional Mastery is the new Superpower.

& a Very important announcement as the end.

Raise your hand if you have wished this in the last week - “I wish I was a calmer person. I Wish I was less reactive.”

Hundreds and Thousands of people over sessions, dm (s) and emails come me with all sorts of questions, at the core of which is mainly this one thing - a lack of emotional intelligence.

But, we need to understand what emotional intelligence is first.

Psychiatrists and Psychologists will tell you that there is no such thing as EI. That it is not measurable thus it doesn’t exist. One of my favorites Dr. Jordan Peterson included. I agree.

However in our daily interactions with other people, it’s undeniable that we exercise something that closely resembles what we ‘assume’ to be EI.

So what is OUR understanding of EI? - The ability to be self-aware enough to see beyond our own strengths and limitations, as a result to be psychologically sharp enough to see through others’ shortcomings and motivations. And finally using a combination of this self-awareness and other-awareness to communicate effectively and function well in a smooth interpersonal mechanism.

I know. It’s a wee bit complicated.

Bottomline is - Know yourself, understand others and play well together.

Now that we know what EI seems to us, WHY am I calling it a superpower?

EI starts within. It starts with YOU.

The better you understand your own light and shadow, the better you understand other’s motivation behind doing things as well.

The more you can understand WHY you or someone does something, the lesser you can be afraid of it and the more you can control your reactions. And that’s what we want ultimately. We fear what we don’t understand - Fear of the unknown.

Emotional Intelligence is KNOWING.

One of my favorite parallels to understand this is a concept I heard Dr. Gabor Mate read - A cage stops being a cage when you understand the make of it. You can deconstruct the cage in your mind piece by piece if you know how it is built.

But, how is emotional intelligence a superpower?

It is about CONTROL. Not in the way you understand control. EI is not about controlling others, it is about being able to control yourself. Being equipped with the ability to choose your reactions. That is true power.

When you react out of frustration you are giving up control of yourself.

Imagine the last time you got into a fight with someone. They said or did something and you didn’t fully understand their motivation behind doing it. You were half aware. NIL or Half awareness breeds irritation. Irritation turns into frustration. And then, to release that frustration, you REACT, you lash out without thinking.

And that’s the exact moment you lose control of yourself and the situation. There is a way of regulating your emotions in the moment. I am also an advocate of actually reacting in the moment and ‘letting it out’ BUT under specific circumstances.

What are those exact circumstances? I will talk about inward facing and outward facing emotional regulation techniques in my Clash to Connection - Emotional Mastery masterclass soon. Click the pink link if this sounds like something you need right now.

Imagine a version of you where no matter what anyone does, you can handle yourself with grace, poise and emotional maturity. Nothing and no one can budge you.

This is the stage where you go from plain emotional intelligence to EMOTIONAL MASTERY, a term I felt was a much better fit for where we are going.

For not just a surface level act of maturity but true emotional transformation.

I am building a universe of mindset, information, frameworks and techniques to help you become the most emotionally masterful version of yourself. The shiniest damn version that you have always imagined yourself to be.

NOW FOR THE MOST IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT.

I am also taking this opportunity to introduce to you - BeingBeyond, my first company and my mindchild. A digital home for everything we will be doing under (what you have known up till now as) ‘helloipsita’ from this point forward. 🎉

As we grow, thanks to you, we have felt the need to make everything ‘official’ and BeingBeyond is the fruits of years of our love, labour and your support. As the company name suggests, BB is all about going above and BEYOND. Beyond what is visible, beyond expectations resulting in true transformation and inner power.

EMOTIONAL MASTERY UNIVERSE COMING OUT SOON ;) Stay tuned

-Ipsita Das

Founder, BeingBeyond